Imagine this: You have dreamt an amazing life for yourself and for those you love. You intend to make a lasting impact on the world. But things begin to go wrong very early. You find yourself face to face with insurmountable problems. You feel hopeless. Your dreams are all shattered.
From this abyss, how do you rise like a phoenix and go on to live the life of your dreams?
Story of a dreamer and his dream
A Biblical story from the Book of Genesis shows the way. Around the year B.C 1890, Joseph grew up as the most favourite son among eleven of his brothers. His father, Jacob, spoilt him with all the good things, to the envy of his brothers. Joseph was also a dreamer. In a series of dreams, he saw his father, mother, and brothers bowing down before him. What galled his brothers most was that they would be subject to Joseph’s authority. Joseph had no hesitation in speaking out his dreams.
His brothers were shepherds and used to go off to far away places looking for pasture for their sheep. Once, while they were grazing their flock in a distant land, Jacob sends Joseph to his brothers with some food and to inquire their well being.
As his brothers see him in the distance, their bitterness comes to the fore. They plot to kill him. But the eldest of them prevails, and they decide to throw him into a dry well instead. They frame a devious plot to convince their father that Joseph was indeed, killed by ferocious animals. Soon after they throw him into the well, in the distance, they see merchants on their way to Egypt. They decide to sell Joseph as a slave.
The Midianite merchants sell him to Potiphar, a high ranking official in Egypt. Potiphar finds Joseph trustworthy and puts him in-charge of his household. But Potiphar’s wife wants Joseph in bed with her. He refuses and runs away. But the lady turns on him, implicates him for rape, and gets him imprisoned.
In the prison, he befriends two palace officials - one a cupbearer and the other a baker to the King Pharaoh. Both were in prison on charges of treason. One night both have a dream and both are troubled by those dreams. Joseph offers to decipher their dreams. The dream is not all good news. As Joseph predicts, the cupbearer is restored back to service and the baker is killed. Joseph had asked the cupbearer to remember him when he is restored to King’s service. But he forgets Joseph and he languishes in the jail till one day Pharaoh himself has a dream. No one is able to interpret Pharaoh’s dreams. It is then that the cupbearer remembers Joseph and his ability to decipher dreams. Joseph, a slave, a nobody, is brought to Pharaoh’s presence. Not only does Joseph interpret the dream and its meaning, he advises Pharaoh on how escape the disaster implied in his dream. Impressed with his wisdom and insight, Pharaoh elevates him to the second highest position in the country.
Eventually, as Joseph predicted, a severe famine descends on the entire region. He saves the people of Egypt through his astute management of resources during the time of plenty. His brothers from the far away Canaan come seeking food in Egypt. They meet their brother but do not recognise him. They fall down before him begging for food. Subsequently, he forgives his brothers for all the misery they put him through. Joseph’s father also comes to Egypt and as a family they stay on in Egypt.
3 Forces that derail your dreams
Joseph’s early life is a story of shattered dreams - more than you can ever imagine. As in Joseph’s life, there are three ways in which your dreams are derailed.
1. When your close family and friends oppose you
Joseph's brothers disowned him and sold him as a slave. Dreams and dreamers are often subject to ongoing intimidation and outright violation. The bigger and more radical the vision, the more the opposition to it. The more it intends to change the status quo, more violent the resistance.
It hurts most, when your own family and your friends, try all they can to scuttle your dreams and your aspirations.
2. The bane of moral ambivalence Potiphar’s wife had power over Joseph. She could ask Joseph to do anything she wanted. Joseph was a mere slave. With the power she had over him, Potiphar’s wife tried to hard to seduce Joseph. In this situation of severe power imbalance, Joseph must have felt intimidated.
But he was unseduceable. He was single minded and focussed. He could not be distracted or bribed. This important characteristic kept him on track.
If he had given in, that might have been the end of his dreams and potential blessing he could have been over the entire land.
3. Indifference - a powerful enemy The cupbearer ignored Joseph’s dreams and as a result Joseph stayed in prison for many more years. Indifference is the worst enemy of dreamers. It is subtle but very effective in killing dreams. It induces a sense of futility and insignificance, in the dreamer.
3 Keys to rebuild your dream and your life
Joseph responded to all these situations with three most important characteristics. Here lies the key for you to rebuild your life when your dreams are wrecked.
1. Your most important behaviour that forces open doors of opportunity How did Joseph respond to his father’s overzealous favour and his brothers’ opposition, both of which can kill your dreams?
With steadfastness and patience. He neither gloated over his privilege his father showered on him nor did he seek revenge and retribution for his brothers.
Perseverance is the ability to stay put through situations that are trying and painful. The motivation for the perseverance is the future joy of seeing your dream fulfilled. It is the ability to see the long term instead of feeling fearful about the immediate.
Perseverance builds knowledge, through failures, disappointments and resistance.
Perseverance sharpens your focus on the goal. All distractions are purified to create a single minded vision of the future.
Opportunity opens its door to those who persevere with their dreams!
2. Your most important character that lays a solid foundation
Many dreams are shattered at the foot of moral indiscretion. In Joseph’s case, he was in a situation of powerlessness. Potiphar’s wife with all her power was bent upon draw him away. Despite his helplessness, he knew he had to make a choice. He knew the power to choose belonged to him. And he exercised it with firmness.
How does moral strength help in making your dream a reality?
It builds inner resilience to withstand adversity. It builds your ability to say ‘No’ and keep saying ‘no’ to people and situations that are detrimental to your dream. It builds the most precious asset that you will have - integrity.
It is integrity on which you raise a network of supporters and collaborators. They are important for your dreams to succeed and thrive. They will share their resources with you if you have credibility.
Moral character also attracts people to you. People who are passionate about what you are doing, would feel it is worthwhile to associate with you or work with you. Moral bankruptcy repels people. Attracting talented and passionate people is essential for you to fulfil your dreams and make a lasting impact.
3. Your most important ability that will make your dream a reality
The dream that Joseph had was not merely a dream of his elevation and power. But it was a dream about the enormous blessing he was going to be, for many nations when their very survival was at stake. Joseph would not have realised the enormity and the impact his dream on the future of his people and nations. So it is with our dreams. Very often, it is in retrospect that we see the force that was unleashed through our dreams.
Joseph does not merely interpret the dream for Pharaoh. He proposes a pathway for the King to avert the disaster. It is here that Joseph shines as a true leader. He saw beyond the immediate potential to grab power. He saw a future with possibilities and hope - and he saw it clearly.
This ability to crystallise a vision of the future, to be convinced of it, and to be committed to it, is the secret to its fulfilment.
Stay true and Keep faith
Stay true to your dream, keep faith and protect yourself from getting distracted and you will see your dream bloom - like a stalk struggles to break out of the ground, and then the bud appears and eventually the flower blossoms, spreading its fragrance to many!